“You do not have to shrink to make others feel comfortable. Your success expands what’s possible for your family.”
This episode is not business as usual—it’s the raw, real, high-stakes conversation every successful woman scaling toward seven figures needs to hear. If you’re the breadwinner in your household, if you’re carrying guilt, if your business brilliance is dimmed by marital tension, this one’s for you. We’re talking about what no one prepares us for: what happens when she makes more.
Too many powerhouse women are silently navigating resentment, shame, emotional burnout, and role confusion while leading multi-six or seven-figure businesses. In this episode, I unpack the emotional, spiritual, and strategic tools I’ve used in my own life—and in the lives of my clients—to help women scale their companies without sacrificing their relationships, femininity, or peace.
If you’ve ever downplayed your revenue at home, hesitated to share your success, or felt like your business growth was becoming a wedge between you and your partner, press play now. Your millions shouldn’t cost you your marriage—and they don’t have to.
Grab your Move to Millions Podcast Notebook, a pen and your favorite beverage and listen in to discover:
✔ 3 Keys to Navigate role reversals with grace – Learn how to lead in your business without overpowering or emasculating your spouse.
✔ How to Communicate clearly about money in your marriage – Discover how to normalize money conversations that foster partnership, not power struggles.
✔ Top tips to Integrate your success into your home life – Create routines and structures that support both your ambition and your relationship.
✔And so much more
This episode is a conversation-starter, a mirror, and a roadmap for high-achieving women who want to make millions and keep their marriages thriving. There’s no need to choose between purpose and partnership—press play and learn how to build both with grace, power, and peace.
Feeling inspired? Then don’t stop here. Head over to listen to the full episode of the Move to Millions Podcast for an in-depth dive into these transformative principles. And if you’re ready to take bold steps in your business and life, consider joining us for Move to Millions Live 2025. Spots are filling up fast, and I promise, this experience will set you on the path to BIGGER in 2025 and beyond. Visit movetomillionsevent.com to secure your seat. Let’s make 2025 your best year yet!
Resources Mentioned:
- Move to Millions: The Proven Framework To Become a Million Dollar CEO With Grace & Ease Instead of Hustle & Grind by Dr. Darnyelle Jervey Harmon – Get Your Copy
- Companion Guide for Move to Millions – Download for a detailed overview of the seven systems to seven figures.
- Join the Move to Millions Facebook Group for ongoing support and community engagement – Join Now
- Move to Millions 90-Day Business Growth Planner – Get Your Planner
- Learn more about Move to Millions Live: Move to Millions Live
Five Powerful Quotes from the Episode:
- “When women have more money, the world is a better place.”
- “Provision is not just financial—your husband can still be your provider in other powerful ways.”
- “Marriage doesn’t need your CEO energy—it needs your wife energy.”
- “Your success is not a threat. It’s an invitation to create a life you both love.”
- “If your business is growing but your home is unraveling, it’s time to recalibrate.”
Questions to Ask Yourself While Listening:
- Am I shrinking my success to protect someone else’s ego?
- Have I had honest, open conversations with my partner about how money flows in our home?
- Am I creating a space for both of us to thrive, or unintentionally excluding my spouse from my wins?
- What role does guilt play in how I show up at home versus in business?
- How can we co-create a vision for our life that honors both of our strengths, even if I make more?
Want more of Darnyelle?
Personal Brand Website: https://www.drdarnyelle.com
Company Website: https://www.incredibleoneenterprises.com
All Things Move to Millions Website: https://www.movetomillions.com
Social Media Links:
- Instagram: http://www.instagram.com/darnyellejerveyharmon
- Facebook: http://www.facebook.com/darnyellejerveyharmon
- Twitter/X: http://www.twitter.com/darnyellejervey
- LinkedIn: http://www.linkedin.com/in/darnyellejerveyharmon
Links Mentioned in the Episode:
- Movetomillions.com
- MovetoMillionsGroup.com
- HausofMillions.com
- Move to Millions Continuum Episode
- Move to Millions Live 2025
Subscribe to the Move to Millions Podcast:
Listen on iTunes
Listen on Google Play
Listen on Stitcher
Listen on iHeartRadio
Listen on Pandora
Leave us a review
Are you subscribed to my podcast? If you’re not, I want to encourage you to do that today. I don’t want you to miss an episode. I’m adding a bunch of bonus episodes to the mix and if you’re not subscribed there’s a good chance you’ll miss out on those.
Now if you’re feeling extra loving, I would be really grateful if you left me a review over on iTunes, too. Those reviews help other people find my podcast and they’re also fun for me to go in and read. Just click here to review, select “Ratings and Reviews” and “Write a Review” and let me know what your favorite part of the podcast is. Thank you!
==========
Full Transcript:
Darnyelle Jervey Harmon [00:00:00]:
You do not have to shrink to make others feel comfortable. Your success expands what’s possible for your family. Keep that in mind and anchor into that it is okay to make more and when you make more, the family has more. That’s what’s important for you to know. You are listening to the Move to millions podcast with Dr. Darnyelle Jervey Harmon, the place to be for high level conversations about all Things millions. Your Ms. Mindset, methodologies mandate movement, messaging, marketing metrics, and most definitely your money.
Darnyelle Jervey Harmon [00:00:40]:
I am your host, spiritual business growth coach, Dr. Darnyelle J. Harmon. Join me each week for inspiring stories, powerful interviews and business growth strategies to help you experience abundance in your life because of your business. If you’re ready to move to your next level everything let’s get this Party this episode is powered by Move to millions live, happening May 21st through the 23rd in Herndon, Virginia. If you are looking for a room where you will be instantly elevated upon crossing the threshold, this is the room for you. Get all the details to secure your seat right now at Move to Millions event. Most women that are out here are out earning their husbands.
Darnyelle Jervey Harmon [00:01:36]:
Can we talk about that today? Listen, no one is talking about the emotional and relational shifts that come along with making more. If you are navigating power dynamics, money conversations, and feeling guilty about your success, possibly even downplaying your success, this episode is for you. Now, personally, as a woman who has made more than my husband from day one, I know firsthand how it feels and how this shift can impact your confidence and your conjugal visits. We’re going to get into all of that and so much more in this episode. Quick question for you. How do you continue to build a thriving business without disrupting your home life? How do you manage money, ego, resentment, and the expectations when traditional roles are flipped? Now, this is a different kind of episode than I typically do here on the Move to Millions podcast, but I wanted to get into it because I have this conversation far too often with the clients that are enrolled in our House of Millions programs. Now, what I know for sure is that men are wired to provide, but it is also important to keep in mind that all provision is not financial. And even when this is the case, your husband may be struggling with the fact that you make more.
Darnyelle Jervey Harmon [00:03:00]:
It’s really a delicate matter. I know from the beginning I knew, you know, at the time that I met and started dating my husband, I was already a millionaire. I was already making amazing money. And not that it wasn’t possible, but can I be honest? I Personally didn’t even want a man who could compare to me financially, because those men, in my experience, are narcissistic, they are competitive, and they really don’t create a safe space for me as a woman to be soft and pink. They really require me to stay. Stay hard in blue and stay in my masculine. And I don’t know about you ladies, but when I come home from a long day at work, all I want to do is plop down on the couch and get a big hug from my man. I do not want to have to compete, and I don’t want to exist in that energy.
Darnyelle Jervey Harmon [00:03:50]:
And so I really wanted a man who would be comfortable and okay with who God called me to be and all that goes along with that, including the fact that I might potentially earn more financially and be okay. But I also wanted to create a safe and aligned space for my husband so he never had to feel like, if you guys remember that movie, why did I get married? And Tasha Smith’s character, I can’t remember what her name was in the movie and how she was always like, this, my money. Like, I never wanted to operate in that energy. And I know the clients that we work with and many of you women who are out there in the same exact situation, listening to this episode, you might not want that energy either. And so we’re gonna get into it. Now, I gotta give my disclosure. I am not a relationship therapist. I do not Play 1 on TV.
Darnyelle Jervey Harmon [00:04:36]:
I am sharing only out of my own experience and what I’ve seen. But I want you to take this for what it is. I am not going to be making any suggestions that you should go out and flip the script inside of your situation. Let’s just get that clear, and let’s just be there right up front. I want this to be a powerful conversation, and I’m hoping that it’ll be a conversation starter for you inside of your relationship. I’ve worked with so many women who are crushing it in their business, but behind the scenes, they’re dealing with guilt and tension and even resentment in their marriages because they don’t know how to navigate this shift. It’s not something that their moms pulled them to the side to tell them about when they were teenagers, because maybe mom, this wasn’t even a possibility for her. Right? And I’ve seen it firsthand.
Darnyelle Jervey Harmon [00:05:23]:
And I know that when it’s handled correctly, it can be a source to create a soft space for you as a woman and get you out of that energy. But if it’s done wrong, it can also create a lot of chaos. So it’s important that you understand some of the things I’m going to share with you to help you to step into your power and how to do so without shrinking and also without creating chaos. When you remember that money is not a measuring stick and it’s not an identity marker and you can communicate that effectively with your husband, the shift can be peaceful and can actually feed your marriage. So today we’re going to break the silence on what it looks like to be a high earning woman in a marriage. We’re going to have some conversations. We’re going to talk about things you need to say, what you conversations you need to have and some of the adjustments that will allow you to keep growing your business. Because you don’t want to stifle what God is doing in you and in your business because you’re afraid that your man might leave you, right? Or that you’re afraid that it’s going to create a power struggle at home.
Darnyelle Jervey Harmon [00:06:26]:
There is a way to do it. So we’re going to get into all of that today because I believe that you can grow with grace and without disrupting your household. So let’s talk about the rise of women business owners. This is a new reality. According to the Pew Research Center, 45% of households are run by women that are the primary earners. Nearly half of all marriages now have a woman that out earns her husband. Yet most financial advice still assumes that men are primary providers. Ugh.
Darnyelle Jervey Harmon [00:07:02]:
It’s also important to keep in mind that women are starting businesses at one and a half times the rate that men are. According to the American Express State of Women owned business Report, they are the fastest growing group of high earners. Women entrepreneurs are. And as more women scale their businesses to and beyond seven figures, traditional household roles are shifting. 70% of women bread owners feel financial stress that their male counterparts do not, according to the Harvard Business Review. And women who make more often feel guilt, stress, and societal pressures in ways that men don’t. We’re gonna talk about why and how to shift that. Okay? So let’s start by talking about some of the common challenges that us women who are the breadwinners face.
Darnyelle Jervey Harmon [00:07:50]:
We’re gonna get into the emotion and some of the mindsets that need to shift. This is important because you have to learn how to navigate without guilt and how to deal with the proverbial role reversals. Listen, I don’t know about you. I didn’t grow up in a family where traditional role there was nothing traditional about the way that I grew up. Lord, let there be nothing traditional about the way that I grew up. Unless this is your very first time here. You already know. I was born to two drug addicts who eventually became crack addicts and the dynamic was difficult and not traditional from the onset.
Darnyelle Jervey Harmon [00:08:26]:
When my mom went to jail When I was 8, I went to live with my dad and my stepmom. It started to get a little bit more traditional because my stepmom barely worked. Every once in a while she had a job, but for the most part she was relying on my dad to provide for her. So it was a little bit more traditional, but not in the normal sense as you maybe have heard me share. Before my stepmom, I used to hear her on the phone all the time talking to her girlfriends or her mother, saying she just wished that Jeannie would come and get her kids. Like my mom was just tricking in the streets and not doing a bid upstate. If you love the Move to Millions podcast and the Move to Millions book.
Darnyelle Jervey Harmon [00:09:02]:
Is blowing your mind, then you have got to join us for Move to Millions live. All the details are waiting for you to secure your seat at move to.
Darnyelle Jervey Harmon [00:09:12]:
Millionsevent.Com My bestselling book, Move to Millions.
Darnyelle Jervey Harmon [00:09:17]:
The proven framework to become a million.
Darnyelle Jervey Harmon [00:09:19]:
Dollar CEO with grace and ease instead of hustle and grind, is now available on Audible. That’s right, you can listen to nugget after nugget, strategy after strategy and chapter after chapter designed to help you to position your business for seven figures with grace and ease instead of hustle and grind. Go to Audible today to get your Audible copy of Move to Millions. And so I didn’t really get to see firsthand what it could look like as a woman who made more, but I made the declaration when I was young that I was going to be rich, which meant that it would be more than likely that I would out earn the men in my life experience. And most of the men that I dated when I was in corporate America, you know, there was really no dynamic adjustment when I was an entrepreneur. I remember dating this man who wanted to compete with me. He would not create a soft landing pad for me. He kept me in my hard, masculine energy when I so desperately just wanted to feel safe and seen and heard and supported.
Darnyelle Jervey Harmon [00:10:30]:
And so that was what made me say, you know what? If it’s about the man having money, let’s not deal with that. I know how to manage myself. I know how to still let a man be a man and create an environment where a man can Feel like a man. Let me be the one who’s in charge of the money. And I don’t know if that was a good thing or a bad thing. I’m just keeping it honest and keeping it real and vulnerable and transparent with you. But the emotional and mindset challenge that ensues when women make more is often because women are conditioned to believe that they should not make more than their husbands. Listen, this is not 1950 or even 1960, right? We are in a new day, in a new time, and that’s not always the case, but that’s what we’ve been conditioned to believe.
Darnyelle Jervey Harmon [00:11:13]:
And if you happen to be raised by both of your parents in a very traditional household, this might not be news to you. This might be something that you know and have experienced because you saw it every single day. Societal norms have traditionally linked a man’s identity to being the provider. Listen, I talk about it all the time. A man wants to be the protector, the provider, and the priest. Right? That’s what they taught us in church. That’s what they taught me in church. We anchor into that, and we create this as our reality, as the normal.
Darnyelle Jervey Harmon [00:11:43]:
But what happens when it’s not? Many women start to feel guilty about their success or worrying about emasculating their spouse. Now, I’m gonna tell you the truth. Before I started dating my husband the second time, yeah, we were like Peaches and Herb. We got reunited. When I first met him when I was 35 was when I first met him, I was doing okay. It was around the time that I filed bankruptcy, and I had gone back to work. So he didn’t know Darnielle the entrepreneur. He really only knew Darnyelle , the women’ center owner.
Darnyelle Jervey Harmon [00:12:17]:
And so our relationship was very different at that particular point in time. Now, five years later, when we got back together, not only was I an entrepreneur, but I was also a millionaire at the time, and so things were different now. I knew enough about him because when we dated previously, he made me feel safe and seen that I could be honest and myself with him. I could let him in. Now, he never asked me how much money I make. Like, he didn’t care about that kind of stuff. He was not trying to figure out how he can get in my checkbook. Right.
Darnyelle Jervey Harmon [00:12:46]:
In any stretch of the imagination. He was also not intimidated by the fact that there was a big purpose and destiny for my life. And that’s what made me love him and want to be with him, because he provided a safe outlet for me. I did not care. I cared that he had a job. I think that that was important. But I didn’t care what his job was because I’ve never been. Sometimes wish I had been the girl that the girls I went to college with.
Darnyelle Jervey Harmon [00:13:13]:
Now these girls, they went to college looking for their husband. They latched onto the engineers for dear life. That was not me. I was trying to figure out how I could take over the world. I was not thinking about or following behind some man. When I went to college, I just never entered into my mind to think that I would have a man take care of me. I think largely because I saw the way that things happened with my dad and my stepmom. Mm.
Darnyelle Jervey Harmon [00:13:37]:
I didn’t really want that. You know, I just. I shunned all of that. That was not what I was interested in. Also didn’t think in full transparency that it would cause a problem because I’m not the kind of woman who’s gonna belittle and make a man feel like less than right now. I think it’s important, and it was important for me that the man be able to lead me. And he. But he did not have to lead me financially.
Darnyelle Jervey Harmon [00:14:04]:
Like, that was not important. Statistically, 38% of high earning women feel the need to downplay their success in their marriage. I’ve seen it happen with clients that will do amazing. They will have had a. A six figure launch and they will not get into the specifics with their husband. And I think that can be challenging. It can be tricky. And listen, I’m not one to speak on what any decision anybody decides to make as they are working with, navigating and dealing with their husband.
Darnyelle Jervey Harmon [00:14:32]:
That’s not my role. But what I want is for it to be a safe space for you to communicate about marriage or communicate in your marriage about money. Right. One of the things that my husband and I did very early in the dating process, as we talked about our relationship with money, we talked about our money personalities and we talked about how we related to money. Like, were we a saver? Were we a spender? Like, we needed to know all of that. I am both a miser and a spender. Don’t try to figure that out, but it happens. And we could have those healthy conversations about it so that when we were going through the process of our premarital counseling, we could talk about how we would manage the money that came into the home.
Darnyelle Jervey Harmon [00:15:16]:
There is no, it’s mine, it’s yours. It’s only ours and our household. That was something that was very, very important to me because I just didn’t want that extra strain. I think marriage is challenging enough and requires work enough without adding something to it. And we also know statistically that the majority of the reasons why marriages break apart are because of money. So there’s that. So here are some things that you can do. You can shift from the mindset of taking away or even earning more and look at it as expanding and growing together.
Darnyelle Jervey Harmon [00:15:48]:
You can reframe your success as a shared opportunity rather than a disruption and really create an environment for your husband to be a part I would tell clients all the time, let your husband take the money to the bank to put it in the bank. Let him see what you’re doing and what you’re accomplishing. Sit down and have a meeting with him and talk about what you’re going to be able to do as a result of what you’re bringing into your home. Remember that your husband really just wants to provide and protect you. Give him space to do that in other ways besides the money. Because remember, provision is not just financial. He needs to provide for you spiritually, he needs to provide for you as a leader. Like there emotionally, there’s so many different ways for him to provide.
Darnyelle Jervey Harmon [00:16:29]:
You can also balance the power without creating tension. When a woman makes more power dynamics will naturally shift, sometimes leading to unspoken resentment and confusion about the household roles. According to Pew Research Center, 29% of marriages where the wife earns more report higher levels of merit of strain compared to traditional income structures. So it’s a thing. But you can deal with it by having intentional money conversations, by setting up recurring financial management and financial vision meetings with your spouse where you are discussing your long term goals, your retirement plans, how money supports the dreams that you share together, and how each partner contributes beyond the finances. Like that’s so important and so healthy to do. Because when you do that, it can change everything and can help you to avoid any of the resentment that could pop out. If you love the Move to Millions podcast and the Move to Millions book.
Darnyelle Jervey Harmon [00:17:26]:
Is blowing your mind, then you have got to join us for Move to Millions live. All the details are waiting for you to secure your seat at move to.
Darnyelle Jervey Harmon [00:17:36]:
Millionsevent.Com if you’ve got Move to Millions the book you need Move to Millions the Planner. It’s the perfect companion as you plan, prepare and position to profit to and beyond the million dollar mark. Grab your planner today at Move to millions planner.com. often we find that when it comes to household roles and responsibilities, there is a lot of resentment because many women feel the pressure of still having to do it all, running their business and managing their household and taking care of the children because they are the woman. Statistically, according to the Bureau of Labor Statistics, even when a woman is the primary earner, they still handle 65% of the household responsibility. So you guys are going to have to talk that thing through and out and get really, really clear. My husband and I sit down and as you know, we do not have children. We have lady, who is our puppy.
Darnyelle Jervey Harmon [00:18:29]:
Pray for Lady. Lady gives us a run for our everything every single day. But we sat down and we created a flow that works for us, right? So we can have conversations. We have a weekly team meeting, just like I meet with my own team every single week as a family unit. We meet as a team and we discuss lots of different things. I believe and will always say that people support, support what they help to create. Your husband will support what he helps to create. But if you ostracize him, if you downplay and dismiss and don’t invite him in, he might feel resentful, and that might be causing strain that you don’t even need to experience in it.
Darnyelle Jervey Harmon [00:19:07]:
So how do we do this? Number one, communicate openly and repeatedly. Money can be the most uncomfortable conversations that you ever have in your marriage unless you learn how to communicate about money and normalize it. That’s why I talk about money so much for you, our listeners, to actually get to the point where you stop feeling strain in your body when the topic of money comes up, and instead you start to feel light and flow and airy and abundance around money, which is just going to open the door. Now, listen, it can be tough. It took us years. I’ve been married from a little bit more than seven years, and it took us years to get to the point where we can have a conversation about something related to money and there not be tension in the room and there not be any animosity at all. It took us years to get here. Years and lots of support from our mentors and other people who help us.
Darnyelle Jervey Harmon [00:19:59]:
But we got there. We both had to look at our own individual money stories and money relationships and find a way to merge it in a way that was gonna honor both of us. Cause we’re both important and we both contribute to what is happening inside of the home. So it’s gonna be important that you do that. Number two, you can give your partner a role in the vision. If your spouse feels left out of your success, tension will build. But make them feel a part of the journey by asking them, you know, Listen, I’m doing this launch, and when I do this launch, that means dinner’s not gonna be on the table. It means you might have to chip in and do a little bit more.
Darnyelle Jervey Harmon [00:20:34]:
You might have to take lady for some walks. But when we achieve this goal and we get this launch off the ground, what would you want? How can we make this a win, win, win. A win for the business, a win for the family, and a win for each of us individually. How can we do this? Talk about it, co create what’s gonna come out of it anytime that you might be spending away. Like, we have a housekeeper who comes in every other week to clean the full house and every week to change the linen and clean the bathrooms. You know why? Cause Darnyelle Antoinette doesn’t have time for that. You know, I remember asking in the dating process, what’s more important that the house be clean or that I clean the house? Had he said that I cleaned the house, then he would not have made it past that point, because I already knew who I am and what I am here to do in the world. And so we have these supports, right? When I stopped cooking, we started using a meal service, and we got a chef so that we could make sure that he ate good, like if I was cooking.
Darnyelle Jervey Harmon [00:21:35]:
And now when I cook, it’s a treat, it’s not a chore, and it’s not an obligation that I hold. That builds extra tension after I’ve worked a full day. So we had to have those conversations and come to the conclusion of what was going to work for us. And I encourage you to do exactly the same thing. A good question you could ask is, how do we design a life that benefits both of us as we scale this business? And then the last thing I want you to do, and this is so important for right now, is I want you to make peace with earning more without shrinking yourself. You do not have to shrink to make others feel comfortable. Your success expands what’s possible for your family. Keep that in mind and anchor into that it is okay to make more.
Darnyelle Jervey Harmon [00:22:18]:
And when you make more, the family has more. That’s what’s important for you to know. So I want to challenge you this week if you’ve never had a money and marriage conversation with your spouse, to schedule one. I want you to be open. I want you to be honest. I want you to make sure that the meeting is solution focused. I want you to go online and find a quiz. There’s a quiz out there.
Darnyelle Jervey Harmon [00:22:41]:
I’m sure lots of people have them. We don’t have our own. So I’m not pointing you to one in particular, but go take a money personality assessment. Have your husband take a money personality or your wife take that assessment as well. And then come together and talk about what you learned about it. Talk about how you were raised around money and what you were taught about money and what makes you uncomfortable around money. Put all of it out in the open and have a dialogue around it. It’s gonna normalize talking about money and reduce the strain and stress that can come from that.
Darnyelle Jervey Harmon [00:23:11]:
If you don’t. If you love the Move to Millions podcast and the Move to Millions book.
Darnyelle Jervey Harmon [00:23:16]:
Is blowing your mind, then you have got to join us for Move to Millions Live. All the details are waiting for you to secure your seat at Move to Millions.
Darnyelle Jervey Harmon [00:23:29]:
And I want you to ask, how can we use my success or our success to create a life that we both love? Oh, that’s such a powerful question. I’m going to ask that to my husband because I don’t know that I’ve ever asked him that exact question. But how can we use my success to create a life that we both love? I want you to think about that and I want to remind you ladies, if you are listening and you make more, your success is a gift to your family. The whole family rises based on what you are accomplishing. This is a amazing thing. It is not a burden. It is a blessing. And I want to invite you to continue to have this kind of conversation.
Darnyelle Jervey Harmon [00:24:09]:
If you’re navigating this shift and you need guidance on scaling your business while maintaining harmony at home, then I want to have a conversation with you. In fact, I want you to join us at Move to Millions Live. We always do the Love and Millions panel where we get to have these conversations about success, clues and tips and things that we can do to better navigate our relationships. Because as women, it is likely that we might make more. And it’s completely okay. And it doesn’t have to mean that you’ll end up alone. I remember. I’m actually glad I remember this.
Darnyelle Jervey Harmon [00:24:40]:
I was about to end the episode, but I want to share this. I have been speaking my entire career, and I remember one speaking engagement in particular. I shared the stage with some powerhouse men. I spoke before the headliner. So I was like, the opener, right, Right before the headliner. And I. I did my thing, as I always do. Anytime you give me a mic, I’m gonna drop that thing.
Darnyelle Jervey Harmon [00:25:04]:
And when I came down off the stage, there was a break. And during the break, the three other Men. I’m not gonna say any names. Cause you wouldn’t know these names. These are big name men in the industry. They all came up to me and they were congratulating me on how well I did. This is their first time ever interacting or seeing me in action. And one of the men said, are you married? And I was not married at the time.
Darnyelle Jervey Harmon [00:25:27]:
And he said, oh, I get it. You’re probably not going to get married because there are going to be very few men who are going to be okay with the power that you pack. And one of the things I did, y’all, and I don’t want you to do this is I internalized that thing. And I carried it with me. Not like a badge of honor, but like, you know, like a brick on my back, I carried it with me. It became a story that I told myself and began to shape relationships that I was in. I was downplaying and dismissing my greatness because I was so afraid that if he knew how powerful I was, he would leave me. That is why my husband is my husband.
Darnyelle Jervey Harmon [00:26:07]:
Because he created a safe space for me from the beginning. He did not care about those material things. Like that was not what he was in it for. He loves me. He got to know me. And that’s a big part of the reason that we got together, because he created a safe space for me. And as women, all we want is to feel safe. All we want is to know that we know that.
Darnyelle Jervey Harmon [00:26:29]:
We know that we know that we are okay and it is okay. And we can be all that in a bag of chips and it’s going to be all right. And it’s not going to create tension and it’s not going to create strife. Because as women, when women have more money, the world is a better place. Can I get an amen? And all we want is a man who is okay with that as well. So if you are not yet married and you are making more, just have faith. There are amazing men out there. And from the onset of your relationship, have those conversations about money.
Darnyelle Jervey Harmon [00:27:03]:
If you are married and you are making more and there is a power dynamic struggle happening at home, open the door and start having some conversations. Lay it all out on the line. Don’t bring your credentials, don’t bring your CEO energy to the conversation. Bring your wife energy to the conversation. And from that space, give your husband the opportunity to create a safe space for you. I think it could change things massively. I hope this conversation has helped you do me a favor. If you enjoyed this conversation, take a screenshot of however you listen to the app, tag me in your stories when this episode goes live.
Darnyelle Jervey Harmon [00:27:39]:
I would love to hear from you. I’d love to talk about this more. This is just my limited perspective. I am not an expert by any stretch of the imagination. But because I work predominantly with women, I see it all the time and I’ve been able to help our clients navigate this period in a way that honors them, honors their husband, and honors their marriage while honoring her business. So I know it’s possible for you too. I’ll see you guys next time. Take care.
Darnyelle Jervey Harmon [00:28:07]:
Thank you for joining me for the Move to Millions podcast. The way I see it, you deserve a business that generates millions. We love to have you join us in May at Move to Millions LIVE to help you prepare, plan and position your company for the million dollar Mark visit Move to Millions event now to grab your seat. If you enjoyed our time together, do yourself a favor, head on over to itunes, subscribe rate and leave us a review until next time. Remember, millions are your birthright and to access them you need only move. See you next time.
Darnyelle Jervey Harmon [00:28:40]:
Take care.
