Ep 194 – Jim Padilla: Read the Room

About Our Guest:

As a Global Impact Strategist and the founder of Gain The Edge, Jim Padilla is known in the personal development and business coaching world as the go-to-guy for all things sales. He is a master collaborator whose purpose is to help entrepreneurs leverage the power of collaboration to scale their business so they can impact the world the way they intended. Jim is known for instilling into his sales team… “it’s not what you say, it’s who you are being when you say it”.

Episode Summary

This episode is powered by The Virtual Launch Event for the Move to Millions Book

There is something to be said for becoming insanely curious and leveraging the questions that initiate in your mind to feed the way you run your business, especially when it comes to sales. Sales, as you have heard me share previously, is one of the key ways that you actually know that you have a company that you can scale and sustain. Your ability to be fully present to investigate all aspects of interacting with a prospective client will determine your level of sales success. Through a powerful conversation with my guest for this episode, Jim Padilla, together we uncover a powerful framework that will help you to “read the room” when you are navigating as a CEO and sales professional in your company. If you’ve been searching for a new way to process and connect with prospects you’re going to want to grab your Move to Millions ® Podcast notebook and favorite pen. This is going to be good! Listen in to discover:

The power of reading the room in every aspect of your life and business and 3 keys for leveraging this power
How to navigate periods in your life and business when you are challenged
The #1 skill you need to achieve your next level of success
Why collaborating is a great way to experience consistent sales
And so much more

Powerful Quotes During the Episode: (basically the whole episode )

Being able to effectively present a product should not be overshadowed by nervous energy.” – Jim.
“To experience lifelong transformation, one must participate in their own transformation while being guided to make decisions.” – Jim
“Entrepreneurs and small business owners must not only navigate objections in sales conversations, but also be able to foster curiosity in the process.” – Darnyelle
“Using the power of writing, one can capture thoughts, ideas, and emotions in various forms.” – Jim

Last book Jim read: How to Win Friends & Influence People Dale Carnegie

Favorite Quote: t’s not what you’re saying or what you’re doing, it’s who you’re being while you’re saying or doing it that matters the most.

Tool Jim swears by to grow his business: pen and paper

How to Connect with Jim Padilla:

Websites: www.gaintheedgenow.com

Instagram: http://www.instagram.com/gaintheedgenow

Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/jimpadilla02

LinkedIn: https://www.linkedin.com/in/jimpadilla/

Incredible One Enterprises, LLC is not responsible for the content and information delivered during the podcast interview by any guest. As always, we suggest that you conduct your own due diligence regarding any proclamations by podcast guests. Incredible One Enterprises, LLC is providing the podcast for informational purposes only.

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FULL TRANSCRIPT

Jim:

You need a pen and a paper. You got to be able to write down your thoughts. Don’t rely on technology because you can always be capped. There’s no such thing as a guaranteed technology that will always be there or that will always work the way you want it or that we’ll always have access to. Or sometimes, right when you need it, the storage is locked up and you have to buy more storage. There’s always something. You’re always at the mercy of somebody else. But I got journals, paper, and pens, and I got gallons of pens that’ll never run out of ink.

Jim:

I can write down any thought, any idea, capture anything. I can write a poem. I can write a book. I can write a story. I can write to myself. I can take. There’s nothing. This is the most powerful tool you’ll ever have.

Darnyelle:

You’re listening to the Move to Millions podcast with Dr. Darnyelle J. Harmon. If you’re ready for high level conversations that position and prepare you to move your company cash flow and connection to and beyond the million dollar mark, let’s get this party started. This episode is powered by move to millions, the book. Listen, you need to stop playing and go grab your copy. In fact, grab three copies so that you can bless someone you know with everything that they need in order to become a million dollar CEO with grace and ease instead of hustle and grind. I have an amazing episode for you today.

Darnyelle:

I know I say that every single time I’m bringing on a guest, and I’m right every single time, aren’t I? Well, today you have the opportunity to sit in on a conversation that really just took on a life of its own between me and Jim Padilla of Gain the Edge. I was literally blown away to hear some of his story and how he’s been able to leverage a skill set that helped him to survive on the streets before ending up in jail and turn it into the multi million dollar company that he and his wife run today. Jim Padilla is a global impact strategist and investor and the founder and CEO of Gain the Edge, a done for you provider of industry leading sales systems and unicorn sales professionals, which he co heads with his wife, Cindy. Jim and his wife have generated over a quarter of a billion dollars in sales. For a long line of high level entrepreneurs. Jim’s mission is to help purpose driven thought leaders untangle themselves from the day to day minutiae of seeking leads and sales so they’re free to amplify their impact while scaling their business. I’m here to tell you that this was a great conversation. You are going to enjoy it.

Darnyelle:

There are so many amazing little nuggets and one liners that Jim shot at us that I’ll come back and I’ll tell you about once you’ve had an opportunity to listen. So take a deep breath, grab your move to Millions podcast notebook and your favorite pen, and let’s jump into my conversation with Jim Padilla. Jim Padilla, I’m so excited to welcome you to the Move to Millions podcast. How are you today?

Jim:

I am blessed and highly favored.

Darnyelle:

Yes. Okay, that’s good. I love know we’ve had so many conversations offline about the role that our faith plays in the work that we get to do every single day and our opportunity to be a light out in the darkness that exists in the world. So before we really jump into whatever Holy Spirit is going to have us talking about today, why don’t you just take a quick moment and tell everybody who you are in your own words.

Jim:

Well, I’m a bit of maybe an enigma of my own. I mean, nothing about my past predicts that I would be in this position that I am today. I grew up in a very challenging environment. My parents were teenagers when they had me, so they had a pretty limited skill set and they learned a lot of things on me and grew up in an abusive environment. Very challenging time. They ended up in foster care at 13 and in gangs on the streets at 16 and in jail by 19. And I learned an awful lot about reading the room and learning what other people can do to me or for me. And I didn’t have God in my life.

Jim:

I didn’t have love in my home. It wasn’t any that. I found all of my approval through gangs, through sports, through places where people would feel like they needed me. And so I spent the first 20 years of my life learning how to read the room and then influence people into my direction so that primarily they would see me as an ally instead of as a threat. So that was how I stayed safe and stayed alive and found ways to make myself useful.

Darnyelle:

Okay. I love that. Okay, so first of all, I was not expecting you to say any of the things you said about yourself. So I just wanted to say thank you for your transparency and giving us something we can really talk about. I love it. I’m not going to go deep into foster care, even the gangs or going to jail at 19. I really want to talk about what you just said reading the room and, well, let me tell you why. This is what I want to talk about.

Darnyelle:

And this is what this episode is going to be called. And I purposely don’t think. I kind of see what happens in the conversation, and already God is telling me that that’s the direction he wants me to go down because I feel like that’s such a tremendous skill. I wasn’t in gangs or anything. I had my fair share of abuse and my parents being addicts and everything that came along with that, my mom going to jail. And I think that a big part of my ability to navigate and be successful, although I might not have said it until I just heard you say it and it resonated with my spirit, would have been my ability to read the room. So first, let’s pretend like the people who will listen to this or watch this episode have no idea what we mean when we say read the room. So let’s first define it, and then we’ll get and dig a little deeper about how we can leverage a skill set like this to help to make us successful in life and in business.

Jim:

Well, it’s funny because I’ve never been asked to define that before. I would define reading the room as the ability to be completely aware of everything that’s happening around you and in today’s world, I’m dumbfounded at the level of unawareness that most people walk through life with, and that will just never be me because I was hyper aware of everything going on around me all the time because I was always evaluating. Is that a threat? Is that friend or foe? To this day, I’m 54 years old. You’ll never find me sitting within my back to a door at a restaurant. Or I always got to see the exits, even if it’s through the kitchen. I got to know where I can go, which guys in the room, if I have to do something, which guys look like the most. I’m always looking for who’s sitting with a manly posture, who’s the guy that’s not really aware? Who’s the guy I would have to take out so that everybody else will leave me alone. That stuff is like just default programming in my head all the time.

Darnyelle:

Yeah, I feel that because I have probably prior to being with my husband, I was very much the same. I have a level of security in him. So now when we go into a restaurant, of course he’s got to be watching the door because he’s there to protect me. And so I can be soft and allow him to do all of that. But I entirely get it. And even the instant revelation or check in your spirit, who’s friend who’s foe and how you leverage that to navigate. And I can only imagine, I’ve heard stories about being in foster care and then for you having been in gangs and them being your family, but all of that being a test of who you are and who you are at any particular point in time, how that would be such a relevant skill set. So as you think about becoming an entrepreneur, and I know today you run an amazing company, we’ll have you talk about that in a little while.

Darnyelle:

How have you been able to leverage this skill of reading the room, like the live in your face room, and in this environment we exist in today, where we’re spending most of our time virtually with one another, how are you using that same skill to translate for the level of comfort and ultimately success that you and your beautiful wife Cindy are able to enjoy?

Jim:

I operate on hierarchies of activity, and almost everything for me starts with a philosophy. And so what’s your philosophy on sales? What’s your philosophy on relatioNships? What’s your philosophy on business? Because your strategies typically tend to be built on the philosophies that you carry and then your tactics from there. And when it comes to reading the room of people, my philosophy I’ve developed over time has been just to be insanely curious, because I found out, and if I can ascertain why somebody is acting some way towards me, it’s going to be a much quicker journey to diffusing it, solving it, or overcoming it, versus just responding to the action. And so anytime somebody was acting a certain way, it’s like, okay, is he feeling threatened right now? Is somebody telling him to do this? Is he responding from fear? Does he intend to do me harm? All of that? And it’s the same thing speaking from stage or in a room whenever somebody acts a certain way. Okay, that’s interesting, especially if you have an idea that that’s not who they normally are. That’s very out of character for who I think this person is, what’s going on behind this. And of course, this is all happening in the fractions of a second.

Darnyelle:

Yeah, I love that. And I love this notion of being insanely curious because I can think about in every area of life, and especially because we’re entrepreneurs, how being insanely curious is the right answer. You kind of said this, but I feel like it diffuses the need to become defensive or offensive by just focusing on getting the questions that you need to answer. Whatever is running through your mind, your own protection mechanism, using that as the tool to determine the questions that you ask so that you can get a level of comfort and they can get a level of comfort. And you know where I’m going with this. I mean, that sounds like an amazing thought process and skill set to have. If you are Jim Padilla and you work in and around sales and building sales teams and leveraging the power of this insane curiosity to allow it to turn into conversion, that’s kind of brilliant. And I don’t know.

Darnyelle:

I feel like God knew what he was doing when he had you grow up in foster care, enter the gangs, go to jail, learn this skill set that today, as you said, the first thing you said is, nothing about my path looks like where I’ve ended up. I think about the fact that before we were formed in our mother’s womb, God knew us and he approved you, even though your path was unlike many others, right? To allow you to show up for such a time as this, in a place like this, with a skill set that you’re able to teach to others so that they can be effective in sales, like that’s not a mistake. Stuck on the six figure plateau, it’s time that you cross over the million dollar milestone with grace and ease. Part memoir and part methodology. Move to millions. The proven framework to become a million dollar CEO with grace and ease instead of hustle and grind, helps entrepreneurs and business owners simplify their processes to multiply their profits. Known for breaking down complex topics, I equip you with all that you need to leave the headaches of scaling your business behind so that you can be empowered and edified without compromising any of your values in the process. It is time for you to make the move to millions.

Darnyelle:

Grab your copy [email protected].

Jim:

Yeah. The only way it makes sense is looking backwards, for sure.

Darnyelle:

Yeah.

Jim:

Because at the time, none of this was, like, a clear path forward of where I was headed. But it is interesting to be able to. When you’re really curious about this and you learn to read the room, then you’re picking up on other people’s vibes all the time. And what you’re not doing is focusing on yours. And so it requires you to be in right standing in right position with yourself, with God, with what’s going on. Because if you get into an environment, whether it’s with a sales conversation with a person, a potential client, or you’re enrolling your team into doing something, or you’re trying to get your kids or your now or grandkids to do something that they don’t want to do. It’s always what is prompting this response. And when you can tap into that now, all of a sudden you’ve completely shifted the focus from, hey, let’s get you to do this thing to, hey, what’s going on with you and how do we help you get there? Right now, you’re both working together to solve a problem instead of you’re trying to sell anything.

Darnyelle:

Yeah, I love that. Well, I mean, there’s two things you said that I want to just pull back for a second because I think, I believe success leaves clues, and this is a clue that I want for our listeners to be able to pick up. When you said the only way it makes sense is to look backwards, that is so good, Jim. I don’t even know if you realize how good that was to play. On the whole, hindsight is 2020. Right after we’ve been through something, as we review it, we can actually see the lessons we were meant to learn because when we were in the midst of it, we were being defensive or offensive, so we couldn’t really get the lesson we were supposed to get from it. So I just love that, first and foremost. And I want to just encourage the listeners.

Darnyelle:

Right. Like, when you think about where you are right now today, I want you to take a look back. Like, I used to have this pastor Jim, and it would always create an eruption in the church. And he says sometimes you just have to look over your shoulder and see where God has brought you from.

Jim:

Yes.

Darnyelle:

And they would go wild. They would be falling out in the spirit and running around and the shout music was on. I mean, the whole nine. And what I think about what you’ve been sharing so far about your own journey and how you’ve been able to take this skill set to learn how to read the room and turn it into, I’m going to call it a framework and a methodology for how you undergo sales conversations, how you train and teach others to do the same by simply recognizing the significance of always looking back and not looking back for the sake of, oh, it was really good back then, or I want to go back there, but looking back for the lesson that is to come out of it, that’s going to carry you forward. So I really love that. So I wanted to point that out. And then the other thing, the question that you ask, that happens when you have this approach right when in reading the room, being insanely curious and as a result, being able to be present to what’s happening around you and ask those questions, and the question in this case being what is prompting this response. And I imagine, and I want you to clarify this for everyone.

Darnyelle:

This is a question you’re asking yourself so that you can judge yourself accordingly with how you interact with the other party. Correct?

Jim:

Yeah, I’m asking myself. I’m like, okay, what is going on with it? If you. And I got into like, okay, I was like eight or nine minutes late to this because I was on my own link, there was a mix up.

Darnyelle:

Right.

Jim:

You could have shown up and said, you know, Jim, my time is valuable. And this is just, I got all coaching clients is going on all day today. I set this time aside and you’re not here. What’s going on? And my immediate response would have been, okay, that’s not normal for this very evolved, intelligent, mature, God filled woman. Something’s going on. So my immediate response would be, oh, my God. Excuse. Excuse and behave.

Jim:

What’s going on? Is everything okay? What’s prompting this? Because my experience of you is that’s an absolute inappropriate response based on who you are.

Darnyelle:

Yeah.

Jim:

Right. So it’s just automatically default position is curiosity. And it might be find out. I just got in a fight with my so and so and my kid was this. And it would make sense because there’s other things going on because that’s an absolutely silly response if that’s how you responded to what was happening.

Darnyelle:

Right, right.

Jim:

And so you just pay attention to that. And it’s like in a sales conversation when somebody says, my life is on fire. I absolutely can’t tolerate this anymore. I have to make a change. And then you say, okay, that’ll be $5,000 when we do this, blah, blah. And they go, you know, I’ll wait till next year. Okay. What would prompt somebody to show up with a life that is literally destroying themselves? Either your Life is not as destroyed as you say it or think, or you’re afraid of what’s to come if you say yes to changing this.

Jim:

So the tongue in your mouth is going this direction. The tongue in your shoes is going this direction. Which one is telling the truth?

Darnyelle:

Or a third possible scenario is they don’t feel safe and seen and heard because they just poured out to you that their life is on fire. And your only response is that it’s going to be $5,000.

Jim:

Correct. And of course, I mean, we’re talking about over the course of a journey, and. I know, but absolutely. And that’s a huge thing because so many times people, I’ve had this happen where somebody will say, we’re talking and they’re like, yeah, I’m sorry I was late to the appointment. I’m in the hospital. My mother’s been sick. I’m like, okay, well, you still need to solve this problem, blah, blah, blah. She just told you her mother’sick, and she’s in the hospital.

Jim:

Is there another question you’d like to ask? Right, like, how’s your mother? How are you? How’s your family? What’s going on? Is this a good time? And then understanding the awareness and being curious. Okay, this was important enough problem for you to solve that you booked an appointment and set time aside, and you’re still dealing with this. So my question for you is, is this a problem that can afford to wait until after your mother’s pref is done, or is this a big enough problem that we still need to solve it now and then we’ll proceed accordingly?

Darnyelle:

I think that’s just being present and treating the individual like they do matter. And they’re not just a stripe notification, right? I live in a glass house, so I’m not throwing any stones at anybody out there who’s treating their potential clients as stripe notifications. I’ve been there, done that, and got the T shirts for when money was funny and I needed to pay a bill. So I needed you to sign up. But what you probably learned, like I learned, is that desperation energy doesn’t convert, right? And so it’s not going to turn into the sale that you want. Whereas as we’re having this conversation, Jim is offering another perspective that gives you an opportunity to read the room, to become insanely curious, to ask yourself what is prompting the response and making sure that you are fully present. To give a response that is indicative of a person that they’d want to do business with, right? Because otherwise you just wasted their time when their mother is in the hospital and their life is on fire.

Jim:

And there’s two perspectives there to really be aware of. One is you can be the drive on drill sergeant and we’re going to make this sale happen no matter what. And what I see more often than not is people, err, far too distant on the compassion side, because your default response shouldn’t be, oh, my gosh, you know what? Take care of your mother. We’ll talk next week. Because now you’re not giving them the credit as a business owner, as a person with agency who can take and make their own decisions. So you got to give them an environment, acknowledge where they are, and then give them some options of how to move forward with you instead of just being the ultra cautious, I’m so compassionate. I’m just going to make this decision for you because don’t do that for me. That will not let me think you’re my leader.

Darnyelle:

That’s good. And I love that perspective and I love that balance that’s being thrown in. Because you’re right. Giving the person the opportunity to, or assuming the person wants to continue to placate whatever it is that’s going on is not good either. So by asking those prompting questions of yourself, and then in turn asking the questions to the individual, you give them the opportunity to still participate in their own transformation, whatever that might look like. Maybe it does mean they need a week. Maybe it does mean they need a longer amount of time. Or maybe it means that they’re ready to go right now and they can appreciate the perspective and that you gave them the space to process instead of feeling like you had to hold to a certain standard of how long this conversation was and what needed to come out of it.

Jim:

Yeah, it’s interesting. I was reading this morning in Romans twelve two, to not be transformed by this world, but be renewed by the transformation of your mind. And I read it in amplified version. I like to do that a lot just to see, like, these are some basic, simple words, and what would that mean? And so in amplified it says, don’t copy the behavior and the customs of this world, but let God transform you into a new person by changing the way you think. That’s so simple, but so clear like that. Let God change who you’re going to be. It’s like in this conversation, the best possible thing you can do is be you, but the best possible version of you is the one that God says to be. So if you can say, okay, how am I showing up as the person that would think differently and allow God to serve this while staying on point? Because all things are possible at once.

Jim:

It’s not an either or, right. So it’s just always being so attunedly aware to what’s going on with them, but always in context of what’s going on vertically.

Darnyelle:

Yeah, I love that. And I love the amplified version. I am often switching back and forth between the new living translation and King James. I like to see it the way that it was intended and then I like to break it down so I can make it easy to understand. And then I’m in my little blue app, breaking down my concordance, breaking down the meanings of the words. Know all of that mad scientist stuff, that really makes a difference so that I understand what the word is actually saying and how I’m supposed to apply it. So I think that makes a difference as well. When it comes to your ability to really leverage, I’m going to call it again, skill sets and even a framework or methodology, and maybe it is already a part of the sales process and training that you guys teach.

Darnyelle:

Is there anything else that anybody who right now who might be listening and our listeners are, by and large, they’re all entrepreneurs and small business owners. They have dreams of making millions. Some of them are doing it already. They’re looking for more consistency. Some of them haven’t crossed the seven figure mark for the very first time. And many would probably even say that the reason they haven’t is their aversion to sales. Right. They’re looking for the sales where the person closes themselves and not the ones where they have to overcome an objection.

Darnyelle:

I personally believe that the sale doesn’t even start until you’re overcoming an objection. So when we think about that as a part of the sales process, is there anything else that these people need to know specifically around this being present and the skill sets of reading the room and being insanely curious that will help them the next time that they have their own sales conversation?

Jim:

It’s interesting because we can beat this metaphor to death. If you’re going to read a room, you first have to be in a room, right. You can’t read the room from outside of it. So first you must be in the room, whether it’s in the stage, in the networking environment, on the phone call, whatever. So you must be intentionally putting yourself into the environment where the change and the opportunity is going to exist. And then you can walk into somebody else’s already built room, or you can build your own room, right? And so if you start structuring your own room like you’re in a virtual world, if I walk into your zoom room, this is your room. You’ve created it however you wanted to create it. You’ve created the walkway to get here, the experience while we’re here, what’s going to happen after I’m here.

Jim:

So you have the ability to control all of that, which if you’re smart about this, and I assume you are, you’re just, you’re curious now. So if you’re listening to this, just start thinking of what are all the ways I can structure my room so that I always have the advantage. And by the advantage, I don’t mean that you have the advantage over somebody else, but you have the ultimate advantage to always win, which means you show up as the best version of yourself. You know exactly what the opportunities are that lie before you. If you targeted the person really well, you’re well curated, your market and your audience. Then everybody who shows up in your room probably fits a certain segment of the population, which means you already know what kind of problems and fears and concerns they have. You already know what are the consequences of not solving those problems. You already know what lies ahead for them if they absolutely win doing the thing you’re going to help them do.

Jim:

So you know a lot more things about them than they will ever know about you, which means you have an unfair advantage, you have a superpower, and all of that is in the room. It’s like everything you put into the room. Let’s make sure the light is the way you want it. Let’s make sure the music is the way you want it. Do you want peanuts and sawdust on the floor, or do you want marble floor? Whatever. It’s like you create that impression, and it’s always the impression of increase in perceived value. All of that leads to perception of value. So whatever they see is what you have allowed them to see and created for them to see, which then creates the movement of the room.

Darnyelle:

I love that. That is definitely one of the things that I love about the whole read the room metaphor is that it really is expansive, and at the same time, it’s so real and relevant.

Jim:

Right.

Darnyelle:

Because we’re all always in a room, and we always get to decide what room we’re in and how we respond and act inside of that room. And so if we’re ever not getting the response that we want in the room that we’re in, it may not necessarily mean that we need to leave that room. It might just mean that we need to develop an additional perspective. 100% right.

Jim:

It could mean you have to show up differently. You have to show up as a different, as a better, as a bigger, as a more compassionate, as a whatever. You have to answer those questions for yourself. I used to have a podcast called sales unscripted because we actually had a sales program called Sales unscripted because I don’t believe I can ever tell you exactly what to say to serve the people who are in front of you. You know, those things to the core of your being. My focus on preparing people for sales is to be able to prepare you to thrive at your best in the environment. And then you already know the words to say because they’re your words and they’re your clients. Right.

Jim:

I can give you some good stuff, and I’m really good at that. But nobody knows better what to say to your clients than you do is.

Darnyelle:

Checking your profit and loss statement and realizing that you’ve made $1 million in cash or more in your business in one year. Your wildest dream? I’ve got just the book. You need to give you a step by step framework to bring your dream to life and to position you to sustain it for years to come. Move to millions. The book will take you from straddling the six figure plateau to making, moving and leaving millions, even if you have no idea where to start or how simple it can be. You can start your journey on the move to millions today by ordering your [email protected] as soon as you place your order, you will join our move to Millions Book Squad and get access to exclusive bonuses that include getting to read the book now before your copy arrives. Once the book release, go now to movetomillionsbook.com and join our book squad by getting your copy today.

Jim:

Don’t count on a script for that. You want to do things that are just going to allow you to be comfortable and reading that room. Like I said, here’s something that I do that I tend to be a little bit contrarian. Some of the things that I do, and I like it. Not different for the sake of different, but different because I just haven’t been convinced otherwise. And people talk all the time about asking great questions, and it’s always better if you, the buyer, say it if it’s your idea versus mine, right? I don’t believe that because most people don’t even understand the problem that they truly have, and they sure as heck don’t know how to articulate it. So we can sit here for days until you come up with the right words, but I already know them because this is my room and I know who comes into my room and I know who wins in my room. So I can say you might be feeling this, and if not, I know that you’re smarter than the other people.

Jim:

You’ve been in business for 20 years. This other guy’s been in business for five. And you’re irritated that he’s making more money than you because he figured some things out sooner than you. Am I right? And this isn’t because you’re lame, but you’re starting to forget how great you are, starting to forget the power that you have and the ability and the capabilities that you have. Right? And you need to be surrounded by a community and a system that’s going to encourage that and feed that back to you all the time while challenging you to your greatness. And people like, yes, that’s what I wanted, that’s what I needed, but they could never come up with those words.

Darnyelle:

Well, and I think you made a really good point that I say this to my clients all the time. We talk about Spice messaging, and SPICE is an acronym that stands for specific and substantive, pervasive and persistent, immediate, insurmountable, clear, contrarian and conscious, expensive and expansive. Right. So any problem that we solve, we need to run it through the filter and need to be able to demonstrate through scenarios and situations like you just gave, about how that problem is impacting them. So in your room, because it’s your room, you need to be prepared for everybody who might enter your room, and it’s your room, so you know what they need if they’re coming in your room. And so being able to be in conversation with a person who has a problem that they have been unsuccessful at solving at their own, and you have the solution, you need to know what to articulate to them, to get them inside of your room, to feel comfortable being vulnerable and transparent that they have that problem and they are indeed looking for a solution. So I think that that is spot on. That if we are going to have our own room, and we all should, especially if we want to make millions, right, that we are responsible to be good stewards of our room and be well prepared, so that as people enter our room, they can feel the acceptance, the expertise, and even potentially the execution of what happens inside of your know.

Jim:

Herniel, I think you may have just created a new program for me in reading the room, because I’ve been talking about this for decades, but I’ve never looked at it from that lens. Like, this is a program. This is an entire.

Darnyelle:

I think it’s a framework. I told you it’s a whole framework. And it’s a skill set that you got, honestly, just trying to survive and navigate life. You learn this skill set and let’s think about sales for a second. Sales is a transferable skill. Once you know how to sell, you can sell anything. And once you understand the significance of the transference of confidence and belief, because that’s really what sales is, you are actually in position to do everything. So as you look at creating this program and you build out what’s in it, I mean, it is about confidence.

Darnyelle:

It is about a thoroughness and expertise about what it is that you offer. It is about embodiment and recognizing being competent as well as confident in who you are and why you have your own room in the first place that other people will want to come into.

Jim:

We’ve been very blessed, and we’ve been in this done for you sales model for ten years, and we’ve transitioned into some other things. We’re doing a lot more consulting and strategic planning with people. But as a done for you sales company, we’ve been able to literally step into other people’s brands seamlessly because we learn how to read the room in their environment.

Darnyelle:

Yeah.

Jim:

So we’re always being able to apply, and it’s interesting, again, taking that whole metaphor, if it’s your room, then you know you have the right settings for the temperature. Okay, let me turn down the temperature on this one because this one’s getting a little bit hot. Let’s cool them down. I played baseball in college, and I refereed high school basketball and high school football, and it’s very interesting because baseball, I’ve said interesting, like, five times. But when you’re an official in a football game and the kids are getting spicy, getting a little saucy, talking trash, and they’re getting at each other, we do what we call speed up the game. Usually you take 45 seconds between snaps. Well, then we’ll speed it up and give them, like, 30 seconds because they got to run, and if they’re running to the next play, they don’t have time to talk trash to each other.

Darnyelle:

Right.

Jim:

But in a basketball game, it’s so fast that when they start getting chippy, we take the air out of the game. So we’ll go over to the scorekeeper. Hey, I just got to check on fouls and what’s going on here. And, hey, can we pump up this ball? We do stuff. So the kids are standing still and losing their steam, but you can’t give the same response to both situations. You just have to be able to manage the room, know what’s read the room, know what’s going on, and then apply the right delay tactics, the right control tactics. Your sales conversation is the same way. If you truly are the expert of the problem, that means you know everything about the Avatar, you know everything about the problem, everything about the solution.

Jim:

All of those things are what we call your badassery, and that’s what allows you to be able to navigate the environment. You have to be certain and don’t apologize to people. When you ask them a tough question, you don’t ask for permission, and you don’t apologize. You just show up as the leader who catches them into the right moment and can pull them out of this function that they’re in and say, I got you, because they don’t need you to. You know, if this is the time and you want to work with me, then maybe we could do work. You’ve already talked me out of it. The moment you’ve said that, you need to say, Arnel, I got you. This is going to be a win.

Jim:

Let’s go do this together. And they need you to be that certain that rock for them and pull them across the finish line to make a great decision.

Darnyelle:

Yeah. That’s why I say sales is a transference of confidence. They’re going to borrow your confidence. They have to borrow your confidence in order to say yes to themselves through your solution. If they were confident they could do it, they would already have the answer, but they don’t. And so your ability to know it’s your room, own your room, and own your room without apology is going to be centrifugal to your ability to convert inside of the room.

Jim:

Yes.

Darnyelle:

So, yes, totally.

Jim:

Whether it’s one on one, whether it’s on stage, whether it’s podcast, it doesn’t matter. Same rules apply everywhere. It has to be clear to everybody in the room that it’s absolutely.

Darnyelle:

Yeah. Undeniable. I love that. When I heard you say it, I just felt something in my spirit, like really rise. That was like, one of the early things that I wrote down, and I put it in parentheses or quotations, because I’m like, oh, I think this is what I’m going to call this episode, just the way it hit me. And so to see how we’ve been able to masterfully keep this metaphor going, it’s a framework for life, not even just sales. I know sales is your work, right? And sales is all of our work. And if sales isn’t your work, it’s probably part of the reason you’re not making millions right now.

Darnyelle:

Because we’re all salespeople and we don’t have to be the icky used car salesperson, but we do need to transfer confidence and belief so that people can say yes to themselves through our solution. We have to be able to do that as entrepreneurs and small business owners. So to be able to take and run with this metaphor all the way throughout, I think is amazing. So I’m excited. I’m excited about the program. I’m excited about getting my finder speed for creating the program. I’m excited about all of that. It’s going to be great.

Jim:

Absolutely. I can tell you this. At the minimum, it’s going to be an event I absolutely love.

Darnyelle:

Well, listen, you let me know and I will come and I will Take the stage and I will get the people ready to learn how to read the room, which I think is just so awesome. Is there anything else, or as we begin to kind of wrap up, is there anything else that’s kind of sitting on your heart, specifically around sales and how we got there through this new metaphor, reading the room or anything else that you really feel led in your spirit to share with our audience?

Jim:

I do. Again, I’m a little bit contrarian. Most people talk like, hey, when you’re marketing and when you’re selling, you got to use your buyer’s language. And again, most of the time they don’t know it. But I do know my language. We’ve generated almost a half a billion dollars worth of sales for our clients. We run 25,000 sales conversations a year. We do hundreds of events.

Jim:

So we’ve got more than enough track record to know the way we do works. I have no doubts about this. You’re going to be way more effective being the best version of you than you’re ever going to be, trying to be the person you think your audience needs. So just show up as you and let the right people be attracted to it. And if you’re one of those people who you have awkwardness, like maybe you’re a baby deer when it comes to selling and you’re just like, your knees are wobly and you can’t stand up straight and it’s nervous. Write this down. This is a freebie. And give yourself this perspective.

Jim:

Tell this to anybody that you’re getting into a conversation with. And this is whether you’re making a sale for a product or you’re pitching to a VC investor, say, listen, I’m world class at solving this problem. I’m just not world class at selling it. So please have some grace with me.

Darnyelle:

Say it one more time.

Jim:

I’m world class at solving this problem. I’m just not world class at selling it. So please have some grace with me.

Darnyelle:

And what does that buy me?

Jim:

How do you feel if you’re receiving that statement? What’s your immediate thought?

Darnyelle:

If I’m saying that I felt almost like I was discounting who I am and what I bring to the table, I don’t see myself ever saying this. I could say the first part, I’m world class at solving this problem. And I would probably go on to say, and if you decide that us working together is your next best move, then I’m 100% confident that I can help to bring you to the result if you’re willing to show up fully for yourself.

Jim:

But you know how many other people say that?

Darnyelle:

No, not many. I understand. I do understand. I’m anomaly.

Jim:

But what I’m saying. But even like the thing you just said, that’s where most people go. And so with you, it comes out natural.

Darnyelle:

Me.

Jim:

And you can’t get away with that, right? This is what we do for a living. We’re leaders, we’re established, we get all that. But even, like, if you’re pitching to a VC product, say, look, what we have is going to blow your mind. Don’t discount the presentation, because that doesn’t reflect near at all at what this product is. Right. So what you’re doing is you’re telling them, look, I’m human, and I just want you to know that I may not sell this the way you want it to be sold, but don’t let that diminish what you see in the product. Right. And then if you’re somebody who has absolutely no confidence in selling this diffuses the other person because you’re telling them literally, look, I’m not here.

Jim:

I’m not a savage. I’m not here to take your money. I’m here because I have something that can really change your life. And if you just beat. I’m not trying to beat you up. And just be patient with me as I navigate this. What happens is the people on the other side of the fence, people on the other side of the table, they start going, hey, no worries, you’re doing great. All of a sudden, they’re diffused.

Jim:

They’re not feeling like, they don’t have to feel like they’re protecting their wallet. They are in a conversation with you and they’re actually rooting for you. They’ve become an ally with you because they want you to win. Takes the pressure out of the situation. And that’s why I always talk about even with the VC pitch, because even for somebody at our level who is looking for bigger things, if you can diffuse the audience, because right now, if you say, I have, something’s going to blow your mind. And if you see this as a great opportunity, I would love to do business with you. They’ve heard that or some version of that ten times a day, every day. But when you say, hey, look, I may not have this presented exactly how you would like it, but do not in any way let that diminish this product.

Jim:

Because this is a once in a lifetime opportunity if you allow yourself to see it.

Darnyelle:

But even that, Jim, is different than what you had everybody write down, because that I could get more behind, right? Like, you know what? I may not be using the words that make sense for you in this moment, but please do not mistake my brilliance and my expertise in this matter. And if you can see beyond my presentation of it, then we could maybe do something really amazing together. That’s way different than at least the way that I perceive it. And I’m okay with us agreeing to disagree because I’m like. I feel like I just let, whenever I see just is a limiter, right? So just by seeing the word like, oh, it’s almost like. But it’s like, you’re amazing, Jim. But okay, I just canceled out the fact that I said you’re amazing because I’m going to hit you with something else. So it felt like that for me.

Jim:

I can see that.

Darnyelle:

But I get the point. I understand what we want people to walk away from this with, right? That you don’t want to allow your nervous energy or your inability to effectively describe how you can solve a problem to taint the fact that you are the best at solving that problem. And I think in those instances, what I would offer, and you let me know if you would agree, that’s when you start telling stories of people that you’ve helped, just like them 100%. I know you love the Move to Millions podcast. I know you can’t wait every single week for me to drop a new episode. You know what that tells me? It tells me that you’re also going to love my brand new book move to millions. The proven framework to become a million dollar ceo with grace and ease instead of hustle and grind. Listen to me.

Darnyelle:

Everything you need to know to make millions of dollars without losing your shirt, your sanity, or anything that’s important to you in the process is in this powerful book. It takes what you are experiencing each week on the podcast to the absolute next level. Go now to movetomillionsbook.com to grab your copy.

Jim:

It’s interesting because the two things I just did a live on this yesterday. One part of I’m doing on the next part two things that are more effective than straightforward content. One is stories and the other is personal time, meaning I tell people you should need to show up for our events just because the Q A time is magical. I can teach you all kinds of great content, and that’s all content. That’s all pre planned, predetermined prescripted. Where the magic is, is in the Q and A’s, is in the. When you’re asking a question that wasn’t part of it, because now I’m like, oh, let me tell you this story and this stuff, you would have never gotten anywhere else, right? And so you tell stories and you do Q and A’s and you can do that. You’ll be way more effective if you don’t know how to build a killer webinar.

Jim:

Don’t just show up and tell some case studies, tell some stories and ask questions.

Darnyelle:

Yeah, I agree, because I think I always feel like every single time clients or community are asking me questions, there needs to be a camera, because I am amazing, way more amazing than I might be based on what I scripted out as the content that I’m going to teach. So, yeah, I agree with that so much. I agree with that. All right, Jim, well, before I let you go, this has been amazing. I have to ask you our move to millions questions. These are questions, and I like to ask them. Although our conversation was grounded in business, often the conversations we have on this podcast are not. So we try to do this as a way to really ground, to help our listeners build their professional library.

Darnyelle:

So, three questions for you. I’m going to tell you all three up front and then give you an opportunity, because I didn’t tell you this in advance, to think about your answers, and then you can answer. So, number one is, what is the quote that whenever you are having a moment, you are questioning your ability to be the impact and change that you were created to be that you go to? Number two, what is the book that has made a significant impact on your own journey to and beyond the million dollar mark? And then number three, what is one tool that you swear by in order to continue to make, move and leave millions?

Jim:

Well, the book, there’s a few, but how to win friends and influence people is the only book that I’ve bought multiple times and have personally given away. I’ve probably given it to ten people because in the middle of a conversation, I’m like, oh, my God, you need this. They just whip it out and give it to them. I think it’s a life changing book. It’s next to the Bible in terms of living life.

Darnyelle:

I agree.

Jim:

And then in terms of my quote, it’s really kind of my thesis and it’s in my emails, et cetera. And it’s not what you’re saying or what you’re doing, it’s who you’re being while you’re saying or doing it that matters the most. So anytime we’re doing something that’s ineffective, we’re not working. I just have to remind myself, who am I being in this process?

Darnyelle:

Oh, that’s so good. Okay. Right.

Jim:

So it’s who you’re being. Just like we talked about the quote that I gave about how to feel empowered, don’t take the words, take the flavor, take the bean, and put your own words to it.

Darnyelle:

And then lastly, the tool.

Jim:

The tool. I’ll tell you what, truthfully, this pen and paper, man, you need a pen and a paper. You got to be able to write down your thoughts. Don’t rely on technology because you can always be capped. There’s no such thing as a guaranteed technology that will always be there or that will always work the way you want it or that we will always have access to, or sometimes, right when you need it, the storage is locked up and you have to buy more storage. There’s always something. YoU’re always at the mercy of somebody else. But I got journals, paper, and pens, and I got gallons of pens that I’ll never run out of ink.

Jim:

I love it.

Darnyelle:

I love it. This has been such an amazing conversation. Jim. Thank you so much for lending your star to our podcast. I’m so excited. I cannot wait for people to hear this conversation. I know that for those who struggle with sales, they’re going to come back to this conversation over and over, and they’re going to learn how to not only read the room, but be the room that they desire to have to convert at the level that is commensurate with their gifts and talents. So thank you so much for taking the time to hang out with me today.

Jim:

Thank you. Honored to be here.

Darnyelle:

It was good, wasn’t it? Oh, my goodness. Okay, first of all, can we just talk about, now that you have listened to the episode, the fact that he had been in foster care and gangs and in jail by the time of 19? I loved when he said that his life was an enigma and nothing about the path that he took should signify what it is that he did today. Even recognizing that his parents, whom he was born to when they were teens, they learned on him. And as a result, there was a lot of trauma and abuse. Right. And how he learned the skill to read the room, which he defines as the ability to be aware of what’s happening around you. I loved when he said that he operates on a hierarchy of activities and he has learned how to be insanely curious because the only way that everything he’s experienced in his life actually makes sense today is by looking back on what has already transpired and happened. He said to read a room, you must be in the room.

Darnyelle:

So good. So many good things. What else did he say that I wrote down that I’m like, oh yeah, yes. I loved how we ended up turning this whole metaphor into a framework that he already has that he can leverage in order to help more people, specifically around sales. So many juicy nuggets in this episode. I’m excited for you to come back and listen time and time again. As you heard me say during the know, Mary Kay Ash actually says, nothing happens until somebody sells something. Your ability to recognize that you are indeed a salesperson and to learn how to transfer confidence and belief so that they can invest in themselves through you.

Darnyelle:

And your solution is going to be essential if you have millions on your mind. So I’m excited about you coming back as often as you need to hear this amazing conversation with Jim, we’ve got all of his details in the show notes for you so that you can go and find them. Hey listen, if you’re interested in one of those read the room retreats that he’s going to throw together as a result of this conversation, make sure that you seek him out and stay connected. It’s always a joy to hang out with you and I will see you guys next time. Let’s make millions move. Take care. Thank you for joining me for the Move to Millions podcast. If this episode has impacted you in any way, would you please take a moment and rate and review? Doing so helps us to deepen our impact and expand our reach around the world.

Darnyelle:

And if you are ready to start your very own move to millions, I highly recommend that you order your very own copy of my brand new bestselling book, Move to Millions, the proven framework to become a million dollar CEO with grace and ease instead of hustle and grind. You can get your copy and our bonuses [email protected]. Until next time. Remember, millions are your birthright and to access them you need only move. I’ll see you next time.

Ep 194 – Jim Padilla: Read the Room

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